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It seems some warning about jumping to conclusions and accusations without adequate interaction with a counselor, etc. However, I disagree that a person being abused needs verification from a counselor before she can be sure she is being abused.Some victims might need that validation from a counselor only because her own perceptions have been regularly discounted or minimized and therefore she no longer knows or trusts her own thoughts, feelings, perceptions, or experiences anymore.I observe many marriages where the women are vicious and relentless in their harangues of their husbands and children.Enough said…I also know first hand that women can be abusive and if you have read anything about my own story, my mother was the abuser and my father was a great man, as is my husband.With that in mind, while I would not want to in any way question your expertise in the area of “abuse,” I wanted to share some of the reservations I’ve been struggling with as I have looked through your materials on emotional abuse.So as not to waste your time, I’ll jump right in with the following questions.
I’m working with a woman who has been strongly influenced by your website in negative ways which are in fact complicating the process of finding workable solutions (I was made aware of your resources through her).I also want you to respond to him from your experience with well-meaning people helpers.Remember, we are all working on CORE strength and so I would appreciate you being constructive and respectful as you respond, even if you get triggered or disagree with his thoughts.I don’t think women, especially Christian women, are typically believed when they talk about being abused (especially when it’s not obvious physical abuse).I believe God has called me to advocate for abused women in church and counseling setting such as in your example.
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Could it be that one of the ways she is thwarting a “workable solution” is that she refuses to do joint marital counseling with you?